Time alone

This time alone has been wonderful, like a much needed vacation. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed the company and do miss the time spent with friends, but there is just something that feels so good about it... that just feels right.

Things don’t normally feel that way for me. More often, they are a struggle and had I known how much of a struggle, I would not have pursued them so. Now, I can see things from a different light. It is wonderful to feel and experience what I had witnessed for others.

Sometime, after returning from Tennessee, I feel like something happened and I had come to and understanding or acceptance with what I was about to undergo. I was alright that Matthew was going to be an 8-hour drive away and that I was not going to interact with the people I would look forward to seeing on a daily or weekly basis. Whatever happened, I am grateful, because I do not know how I would have fared through this experience otherwise.

Though I do miss the people I would talk with and spend time with, I am relishing this quiet time. So, no offense to anyone… I still love and care about you all. This time is much needed and is a preparation for what is to come. Soon, I the loneliness will set in, but I hope I will be able to accept and deal with it. It’s nice to be anonymous and to have things be new and unknown. Though it doesn’t last long, I guess I’m just enjoying it.