Size small

In a search for a desk, I entered one of the many commercial chains taking hold. Before making my way to the furnishings area, I was sidetracked by their clothing sections. Though I’m not in a position to buy any new clothing, I peruse the racks anyway. Finding a pair of cropped yoga pants, size medium, I head to the dressing room to try them on. Surprisingly, they are too big and I have to look for a smaller size. I locate a pair labeled small and gleefully head back to the fitting room. I cannot remember the last time I have worn a pair of pants or shorts sized small.

I try on the pants and end up purchasing them, partially because they are a small and fit and partially b/c I have been considering purchasing a pair. As I left the store, with clothing unneeded and no desk, I begin to think about my motive for purchasing the pants… because they were a small and they fit, when I am normally a medium, on a good day, if not a large.

So, what’s the big deal? Why did this short-lived ego boost [I later noticed the pants were mislabeled and they are in fact a medium] linger in my thoughts? Well, it made me think about societal norms and how I too am influenced by them. Striving to be thin, a thin that would normally be considered unhealthy. I think that I am a string individual, with my own thoughts, ideals, and desires. Yet, some are shared by others, some I often question… as to whom they belong.