Charting the Neuse

Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to help the North Carolina Power Squadron monitor a few areas on the NOAA charts within the Neuse River Estuary. It was quite a nice surprise, being that the area we were checking lies within the study area of my project.

It was really nice to be out on the water cruising around looking at maps. What more could someone want? A friend from Raleigh rang early Saturday morning saying they were driving through Greenville and would I like to go to New Bern and help with the Coop Chart Meeting. Unfortunately, they only have one per year, but perhaps next year I'll be able to go again.

The call of the open road

Every morning when I straddle my bike and start off toward campus, the invigoration starts to run through my veins. Faster, harder, faster harder, the words roll over and over in my head, wanting to go further and within seconds I am on campus.

The loyal and lovely yellow steed I ride carries me well, but I do often ponder about the addition of another higher precision beauty and today I came across a couple beautiful subjects. The Biomega Copenhagen bike is gorgeous in addition to the more natural innovations, like Calfee's Bamboo Bike and the more casual Xylon Bikes.

Passing time

The last few weeks have been trying, to say the least, and through the depths from which I have bottomed out and risen from, I am finding lingering feeling of unwanted nonessential. Generally, in times such as these when something or a series of things brings me down, there is something, a thought, or resulting action that would not have occurred otherwise, but seems essential or necessary for future circumstances. However, the depths to which I sink seem to keep getting deeper, the peaks shallower, and less significance results overall.

Is this a new trend?

I sure as hell hope not. Every time I travel further down, I feel as though I will not be able to overcome it and pull myself out.

Are others dealing with similar circumstances? Sometimes I look around and feel everyone else is dealing with their own personal tragedies fine.

Weight of emotions

The hardest thing about getting older is growing farther apart from those I care about. Yes, there is added stress and responsibility, which are very tasking on one physically and psychologically, but growing apart is and has had more of an impact than all other things. Perhaps it is my ill ability to simply accept that that is the way things are going to occur and be satisfied with it. Accepting that would make things a hell of a lot easier, that is true, but it is something I do not seem to be capable of doing.

It can also be looked upon as though I brought it upon myself by moving away from home to pursue an education and in thinking this, I often ponder if I have made a mistake. It was not an easy decision to make and was very scary, for a variety of reasons. However, it has been an enduring growing experience and although if given the chance I may have passed on the opportunity to have some of these experiences, I hope they were necessary and will be a benefit in the long run.

What it comes down to is this: I should be grateful that I have been fortunate to have such wonderful people be in my life, cherish those memories, and not be sad or disappointed that future moments of time spent together do not occur. Energy in these areas only subtracts from that in the present and what can occur there and in the future.

Perhaps one day I will be able to listen to my own advice.